When the Sun Comes Out
We’re only a month and a half into this year and I feel as if I have wasted it. Now, before I go into all the things I could have done, let me remind myself that this year’s mantra is “Slow Down.” That was the number one goal I had for myself this year. We have spent many hours at the football field, baseball field, gymnastics studio, commuting, working, going, and I wanted this season to be different. Why? Because “I AM TIRED!”
When my 12-year-old decided to sit a season out of baseball this spring, I felt a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. It’s still hard to believe my very athletic son decided to take a break, but our family needs it. My husband’s career and my own have new challenges this year and it really is a blessing to have a break in our hectic schedule. So why do I feel like I have wasted time this year?
First, we are used to going, going, and going. Practice and games and my day job is 45 miles from home. I am not accustomed to couch time or time to just stop and think. Couch time…lol. I remember that from my twenties. So, when my agenda isn’t full, I tend to be lost. I should channel that time into working out or more self-development books, but I am struggling to transition that free time. It’s almost like I am frozen. I find myself scrolling Facebook or laying on the couch.
The sun has a big impact on this transition as well. It’s been a gloomy, cloudy winter. This Texas girl needs her sunshine. I mean, I was vitamin D deficient for a long time. Luckily, I overcame that, but I need my sun. Today, I made it home from work and I sat down to write this blog. What? I did something productive? Yes, because the sun came out. It’s amazing what a little sunshine will do. It will be dark soon, but I am hoping this productivity lasts after the sun sets.
The sunshine today did get me thinking. Just when we think things will continue to be a certain way, it changes. Just when you think things are bad, they get better. Just when you can’t take this season anymore, it changes. I want to continue my season of rest and slow down. But I choose for a season of productive rest. Yep, you heard that right. “Productive Rest.” Just enough rest with an emphasis and focus on the important things. The things that matter. The things that will make a difference. A focus on the ones that are important. A mind that works but is at ease. A slowdown, but carefully directed.
I must go now. I need to mark some things off my calendar and add some new things for this spring. I need to redirect myself from busyness to productive rest.
- Natalie Bonkowski